"For Better or Worse... but not for lunch"

OK, this is still my old blog. But as you can see, I haven't written here in quite a while. Most of my writings are on my journal website by the same name. But I have decided to add "Retirement - a new experience" to this "Cats, Coffee, and Chocolate" blog. It will give me an avenue to record the adventure in its early days.




Recently (like 10 days ago) my husband of 42 years took his first day of retirement. It was thrilling... and frightening... at the same time. Thrilling because it was a new experience for us - an adventure into the unknown. And frightening to think that there would be no more paychecks coming in. How would this work? Did we have enough saved to live for another what... 10 or 20 years? (If we're lucky) Our 401K's took a beating like everyone else's in the current economy, so we're certainly going to have to survive on less than we'd planned. Could we?





Well, we'll have to, won't we? But it'll take a little time to sort things out. Right now I'm dealing with what it's like to have someone home 24/7 that's never been home 24/7... except for limited amounts of time (like weekends and vacations). It's different... and takes a little getting used to... for both of us. I think we're going to like it as long as we continue to be aware of the impact this change has made in the way we have previously done things.




For instance, I work mornings at a bookstore, come home, give my cats their treat, and then sit down to read the paper and eat my lunch. With hubby home, he may want me to fix his lunch, or go out to eat, or run some errands with him (or throw the paper away before I get home). And although this is a small thing, it changes my routine. I use that first 45 minutes after work as 'downtime' and then I'm ready to move on. I can adjust... but it's nicer when he is aware that this is different for me. (a friend whose husband has been retired for many years now said this to me... "for better or for worse, but not for lunch.")




Time and money... these are the things we'll have to work out. Not anything new that we haven't dealt with before (I mean, hey, it's been 42 years), yet now in a different way. We've discussed some of this previously; like which up to now routine expenses we might forego, which new ones we might have to take on, where we could trim the budget and how to work out insurance plans, etc. So we're not completely in the dark. And I'm not complaining. Actually so far it's been kind of fun... but again, it's only been 10 days.

Getting to it

Monday, June 3, 2008

* Getting to it...

It's been almost 3 months since Mama passed. It's taken me this long to even think about going through her things. Mama lived with us since 1994 and even though she was in an Assisted Living Facility the last year and a half, it's amazing how much stuff she had... clothes (Mama loved clothes!... her closets upstairs look like she kept clothes from years back - she and I counted her blouses one day, there were over 200), tons of costume jewelry, shoes she hadn't worn in years, purses, little things she picked up here and there,... and bills and letters and pictures that filled her drawers and boxes.

It feels odd, this going through another's personal belongings... like you're intruding on their privacy... which you are. If I hadn't previously felt this strangeness when my brother passed in 2000... going through his home and sorting through his belongings... I would be having an even harder time now.

Maybe it's still too soon. It hurts to think about the last few months. Mama had a hard time from November through March, fighting Pneumonia and Alzheimer's. I guess living to be 94 and not having any other debilitating illness is amazing, but it's still awful to watch someone you love suffer... even for a relatively short time. Mama always ralied. I guess I figured that she's somehow pull through this time also. So it was a surprise when she didn't.

And it's a bittersweet time because I'm glad for her that the suffering is over, that she's with my dad,sister, and brother in a better place... but... it's still hard to accept.

I started this on Monday. Didn't finish. Couldn't. Now it's Sunday, June 8th already. Guess I need to finish it and get it posted. This week has been a bit odd. Guess in some ways it's been good. I've started writing again. Spent a good bit of this weekend finishing a story. It feels good. I'd almost forgotten how good it feels.








Oh, I do have a funny story to tell. It's about our cats. This weekend we were shopping. At one grocery store we pick up most of the cats' food and supplies (canned, dry, litter, litter recepticles, etc.). For 7 cats, this is quite a bit! Sometimes we pick up a few things there for ourselves - like bread and cheese (the rest we get at Central Market as we try to eat only fresh). We realize that being part of the older generation (60's), the clerks and others probably think it strange that we buy so much 'catfood' and so little 'people food'. I've been dying to have someone ask so I can tell them that the catfood is really good with the bread and cheese. Now this isn't the funny story.



But this is. Since the weather has gotten very hot lately - in the 90's we have been concerned with our outside cats having enough water. There's a creek in the back, but it's not uncommon for it to be dry in the summer. And there's a fountain, but the birds use it and I'm not sure it's healthy for the cats to drink where the birds bathe, etc. Anyway... we bought one of those outside water bottles that look like a 1 or 2 gallon jug over a bowl that refills itself. Should be OK.



But then we saw this inside water bowl that has a pump and the water has a filter and runs down the side of a slide and fills the bowl, circulates, and continues to do this. Well, with Ghost in the house (she's the little one with the genetic kidney problem), we worry about her bowl ever being empty as the Vet has told us that we must make sure that she always has access to water... or she could die.

Well, we bought this refilling water bowl. Julie, one of the Black and White's thought it was the coolest thing... the others basically slunk up to it on their stomachs as if it were some alien creature that had invaded the kitchen. I should have taken a picture, but was so enjoying watching their idiotic behavior that I didn't. It was hysterical to see 6 cats all converging on their stomachs very stealthfully towards a small blue bowl of running water.

Well, that's my story. Thanks for reading.

Rian

Almost Friday already!

Thursday, May 22, 2008

* almost Friday already... and thru to Sunday

I can't believe that it's almost Friday again. The weeks seem to be flying by. The weather is warm to hot, but not bad... yet. It's been cool in the morning, which is nice, then by late afternoon or early evening, it gets up in the high 80's and sometimes 90's. But it is nearly June.

And thank god they finally showed reruns of the last 2 episodes of "Lost". I slept through the originals now that the show comes on at 9 PM. But these reruns were 7 - 9 PM Wednesday night, so now I'm caught up.

Actually it's now Sunday, May 25, 2008 - my Dad's Birthday!Of course my dad passed away in 1981, so I guess he doesn't celebrate it - or maybe he does - who knows? But I do think about him on this date. He was such a good man; English, proper, and with a great dry sense of humor. I wish I had had more time to know him.

Well, it's Memorial Weekend. Time to reflect on all those who have sacrificed so much for Freedom and 'the American way'. I know that the U.S. is criticized a lot these days, but there are still people wanting to come here... and those of us here who know things aren't perfect, but appreciate what we do have... and hopefully will continue the good fight to make it better. However, the world is made up of all kinds of people and there will always be those who 'oppose'. But I think that most of us believe in freedom and honor and human rights, and if we just keep at it, one day we may get it right (or close). And the truth is, it may not be so much the getting it right, but the trying that counts.

Yesterday was busy. We ran errands all morning, then moved some more things to storage, then went to the Dallas Symphony in the evening. Today is quieter. I made pancakes this morning and am now catching up on my journaling.

The picture on top is Tux watching a Garfield movie. He was really into it. Take care and have a Happy Safe Memorial Weekend!

Rian

A Good Day

Thursday, May 15, 2008

* a good day...

Today was a good day. I worked in the morning at the bookstore, met a friend for lunch, visited a 'seasoning' shop, and then walked in the park in the late afternoon. It was cool and green and we sat for a bit on an old bench and had some fresh black coffee (which I bring in a thermos). We don't walk far. My friend has a back brace and uses a cane. We used to walk for hours, but she can't do this anymore. However, we still enjoy the outing. I bring my camera and sometimes we see wildlife. We've come across snakes, rabbits, lizards, birds, ducks, hawks, squirrels, and once a bobcat.

Later I pan fried some thin cut pork chops, and seasoned some whole wheat pasta with onion/garlic/sweet basil, added some fresh cooked broccoli and drizzled it all with a home-made wine and cheese sauce. Fast, healthy, and pretty tastey.

Update on books I'm reading:

Just finished an advanced copy of "Final Theory" - it's due out in June I believe. Good story, similar to Divinci Code in many ways. Definitely kept me reading.

Also finished an Evanovich mystery ("Plum something?"). It was enjoyable also. You have to read a few of Evanowich's books before you get hooked. She's... different. But her characters can really make me laugh.

And I'm almost through with "The Last Lecture". It's also a good read. Short, to the point, and makes you think.

I guess that's it for tonight. My computer is really beginning to give me problems so it's possible that I won't be back on for a bit. It was so-oo slow last night that I gave up on trying to get on. Tonight it's a little better.

So, have a good one! Take care, and thanks for reading.

Rian

Mother's Day 2008

Sunday, May 11, 2008



*strange mother's day...






This Mother's Day seems strange... it's my first Mother's Day without Mama.

Hubby asked me what I wanted to do for Mother's Day and I didn't have any problem answering, "Nothing". Didn't want to go out, didn't want flowers or chocolate, just wanted a quiet weekend where I could 'putter'. And that's pretty much what I've done. Yesterday we did our usual errands, cleaned up, put things away, played with the cats, and did some reading. And I actually fell asleep in the afternoon for a bit. It was nice.






This morning we slept late (till almost 7am). Now I'm drinking my coffee and catching up on my journal writing and reading. So far, so good. I may make some raspberry scones later... BTW, the homemade mayonnaise we made last week was really good, and simple to do. I like it because it's 'fresh' and you can make a small amount as needed.

The picture on top is one of me taken about a year ago - cropped out of a larger photo. There aren't many pics of me since I'm the official photographer in our family - and this is great by me - would much rather be the one behind the camera then in front.

This entry may be short, but must get on with my 'puttering'. Hope you all have a great day and thanks for reading.






Rian




(If anyone wonders about the space between the paragraphs, I'm having a little trouble with that... either they're non-existant or too large ???)

Watching the golf channel...

Thursday, May 8, 2008

* watching the golf channel...

They delivered our new HD TV today and although watching television has never been one of my favorite past-times, I have to admit, the High Definition sure does look good. So good that when my hubby came home, I was watching the Golf Channel (and neither of us plays golf). But the greens were so-oo vibrant. Then I discovered Animal Planet and Meercat Manor looked terrific!

You have to realize (and I know this really dates me), but I do remember our first black and white TV (I was 7 or 8). Boy, technology has come a long way! Even the commercials look good in high depth - which is great because I think instead of the usual 1 or 2, most channels now have 4 or 5 commercials during a 'commercial break'. These are my downfall. I stayed awake through 'Gray's Anatomy' and almost made it through 'Lost'... but then they lost me during one of the last long commercial breaks. By the time I woke up on the sofa, it was close to midnight.

BTW, the picture at the top is an old one of a chicken pot pie that I made a while back. It was from Jan Karon's cookbook (you know, the Jan Karon who writes The Midford Series?). Anyway, it was very good... but took forever to make. It starts out with you making your own chicken broth and ends with you making your own pie crust topping. Took me all friggin day. Yes, it was very good... but not often do I have all day to cook. So I took a picture to remind me of it and haven't made it again since.

Well, the weekend is almost here again. And it's Mother's Day Weekend! So Happy Mother's Day to all of you out there! May you have a quiet safe relaxing weekend! And as always, thanks for reading.

Rian

Home-made mayo

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

* home-made mayo...

Not an extraordinary feat (making home-made mayonaise), but one I'm looking forward to. I have a friend who is going to teach me this small thing. Since I don't care for mayo (or at least I don't care for Hellman's or Kraft's... I used to like Blue Plate when I was younger and living in New Orleans), my friend said that I might like the home-made variety. So I thought we'd give it a try sometime this week.

And I apologize for not writing at all yesterday. It was Cinco de Mayo, but that really didn't stop me. I just got busy with other things... and took a short nap. But it really is important to write daily, so I will try to do better.

BTW, we ate the cajun red beans and rice that hubby made last night. They were great. He puts in lots of onion, garlic, green pepper, bacon, sausage, and ham. In N.O. you can get pickled meat to put in your beans, but that's not available around here. The other concession we make here in Texas is we use brown rice instead of white. Hubby is pre-diabetic and the brown rice is supposed to be better for you. We like both, so it's fine.

On another topic - I'm not too computer savy - I can work on one fine, but when it comes down to knowing the technical goings on, well - I' don't. So there's a question I have that I'm sure is not too complicated. In fact, it may be so simple as to be embarrassing not to know how it works, but what is a RSS feed? I know that it enables people to read your site without actually going there??? Should I do this and is there any danger (security risk?) involved? It seems that if you want to read and write daily journals, then this is the way to go???

Well, that's it for today. If you can give me any advice as to the RSS feed, I'd appreciate it. Hope you had a great day and thanks again for reading.

-Rian